Thousands of gay men throughout the world find themselves in marriages to women because they didn't understand their homosexuality when they got married. Despite having honorable intensions most of them consider it as the “right thing” to do because of religious, family, and societal pressures. They hope that those nagging attractions to men may fade away because of the love of their wives and children. However, this does not always happen. As a result, many of these gay men spend years of their lives feeling confused, guilty, trapped, and unfulfilled.
Here's something that women need to know if they find themselves with a man who is gay:
1) Not all men in passionless marriages are gay. There could be different reasons that a husband takes no intimate interest in his wife. There may be another woman, he might have a physical or psychological problem, or he may be asexual.
2) Not all gay men recognize their sexual orientation when they're dating or when they marry. Some men may be more attracted to their own gender, confused as to why, and attempting to fight their feelings for other men.
3) Some gay men may marry women in the belief the relationship will change the way they feel about their own gender.
4) It may take years before some men become comfortable enough with themselves to “come out” to themselves and to those they love. It is not a surprise that many straight marriages don't survive once the husband “comes out.”
5) Don't live in the disillusion that with the “right woman” (themselves) their husband will lose his attraction to men.