Soha Ali Khan recently opened up about the life lessons she has absorbed from her mother, veteran actress Sharmila Tagore. The 'Rang De Basanti' star reflected on her mother's marriage to Mansoor Ali Khan Pataudi and the principles that helped hold it together.
In a chat with Instant Bollywood, Soha shared, “She managed to stay in a marriage till my father passed away, and I think being in a monogamous, long-term relationship is very challenging, especially today. There are a lot of options,” Soha admitted, adding that her parents’ bond continues to inspire her.
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Staying rooted in family values
Soha also shared how Sharmila emphasises the importance of family ties. “She often reminds me of the need to stay connected to the extended family,” Soha revealed, cautioning that modern life makes it easy to lose touch with relatives. For Sharmila, relationships don’t just exist between couples; they extend into wider networks of kinship, care, and belonging.
The advice that stood out
Among her mother’s many lessons, one statement particularly stayed with Soha:
“Don’t offend a man’s ego and don’t offend a woman’s emotions.”
Soha acknowledged that while the line may not sound modern, it continues to hold value for her in practice.
Reframing Sharmila Tagore's marriage advice for today’s world
Psychotherapist and relationship expert Namrata Jain says that while the advice sounds dated, its essence is still relevant if we view it through a modern lens.
“In today’s day, the statement comes across as very gendered and slightly archaic. People are far more aware of their emotions today, and being egotistic cuts across boundaries of age and gender,” she explains.
“If I were to reframe this, I’d say – we must be very conscious of not offending anybody's ego and also be very mindful about people's emotions. That said, the advice does bear a lot of meaning if we are able to strip away the context of gender and examine what it stands for.”
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Namrata adds that while earlier generations navigated relationships with more clearly defined gender roles, today the focus is on mutual respect and emotional intelligence. “Regardless of men or women, we must all endeavour to be more mindfully aware of our emotions and our expression of these emotions,” she says.
The conversation highlights how generational advice can evolve with time. However, the issue remains the same: building a strong partnership!
