London, Jul 27: The death of Amy Winehouse has caused numerous celebrities and entertainment figures to think about their own addictions - whether it be about how much they still struggle with them or how grateful they are to have overcome them.
One of the more recent people to speak out about the dangers of substance abuse is Mary J. Blige, who in an episode of VH1's Behind the Music, shared with fans and viewers that she spent a large portion of her life struggling with alcoholism, addiction, and overcoming being molested as a child.
On being abused as a child, Blige said, "When I was five years old I was molested. I remember feeling, literally, right before it happened, I just could not believe that this person was going to do this to me. That thing followed me all my life. The shame of thinking my molestation was my fault. It led me to believe I wasn't worth anything."
And about her alcoholism, she said "It was bigger than me. And it was definitely going to kill me. So I was like, this is it and let's go. And I remember sitting on my bed. I swear, I don't know what death feels like, but I felt like my spirit was trying to leave my body."
Blige even commented on her addiction to cocaine, which she described as beginning when her relationship with K-Ci Hailey began to decline in the 90s.
She said "I really didn't care about myself. I was borderline suicidal...I was like the walking dead; just smoking and drinking and hanging. I remember saying a prayer: 'Send me someone to help me.'"
Blige eventually found help in Kendu Isaacs, her current husband, and credits him as the reason for why she decided to get sober.
She said "I stopped drinking. It was will power. It was prayer. It was really hard. But, I cared so much about him, I didn't want to be just this alcoholic burden on him. He doesn't deserve for me to be some, you know, slum-bucket alcoholic, and so I took responsibility and I cleaned up, as much as I could. But it was hard."